Special YouTube Edition

God bless teh funny.

While everyone’s off at RWA (July 30 - Aug 2), I’ll be doing a mini-conference for those of us left behind.

Topic: Pre-Submission Self-Editing Tips

Part of it will be a Q and A, so if you have questions, leave them in comments and I’ll answer them when the time comes.

*enters and quickly locks the door, casting wide-eyed paranoid looks from corner to corner*

Help me.

I married Carl from CaddyShack.

The deer have eaten his garden.

Dangerous and terrible things are happening in my back yard.

Thanks to Shannon, I’ve roped myself into doing a workshop for us stay-at-home types during RWA Nationals.

In trying to come up with a topic, I had a lot of ideas but nothing really jumped out as being truly useful. So I’m turning it over to you all for topic ideas.

It can be anything writing or editing related. I’m not that picky. Okay, yeah, I am, but hit me up with requests anyhow.

And speaking of fight or flight, I’ll be off before Renee finds out I still haven’t finished my newsletter article.

Have a good weekend.

1. When lightning strikes extremely close to your vehicle, it’s possible to see your own retinas. (they’re kinda reddish orange with black and white spots)
2. My husband thinks I closely resemble a former president.
   
3. When my daughter says she’ll throw up if she eats anything, she means it.
4. People will do strange things to the hind-end of unknown animals.
   
5. I can, upon occasion, accidentally take a decent picture.
   

Anyway, we’re back, and I’ve a lot of catching up to do. Therefore I’ll be firmly entrenched behind the grindstone for the next few…evers.

Salud

This is why your parents blush sometimes.

(Blame Auntie Doni)

We’re off to Mt. Rushmore. Back Wednesday.

I’m starting to get “those” emails again, about which genres Lyrical Press is hungry for right now, and figured I’d post the information here so everyone could see it.

First, before I say anything else, a good story is a good story. We will always snap these up regardless of genre, even if I have to use the jaws of life on the release schedule to fit them in.

Second, Lyrical is always looking for paranormal stories. They might have romantic elements, they might not. And if they do, all sensuality levels are welcome.

Third, if your submission is fewer than 20,000 words, I can’t help you. We might make a rare exception and fit something into a TALES FROM THE SHADOWS anthology (romance with ghosts, 20-25k length) if it suits, but otherwise, no dice.

What we’re eager to see:

• As mentioned above, we’re always looking for stories with paranormal elements.
• Romances, all genres, of the 30,000 to 60,000 length. We get too many that are really short (which we can’t use) or really long (which are price-point prohibitive for both ebook and print).
• Action Adventure/Thriller with or without romantic elements.

What I’m a total sucker for:

• Alpha-male seduction romances a la Harlequin Presents
• Romantic suspense
• Ghost stories with great characterization
• Action Adventure, with or without romantic elements
• Psych thrillers with exceptional heroes and villains
• Spec Fiction with exceptional world builds

So there you have it: our current wish list. And for reference, our submissions address is submissions@lyricalpress.com.

Please visit our Submission Guidelines for pointers, and as it appears our file type section has gone missing, we prefer .doc or .rtf.

(I dig .doc, because I am old and set in my ways.)

Have a good weekend.

I was working on an in-house publication today when I happened across this page.

Classic.

1. Becoming emotionally attached to walleye can be a bad thing.
2. Four straight hours of RockBand drums can kill shoulder and back muscles.
3. Gloating over flawless performances isn’t the best way to wish someone a happy father’s day.
4. Cats don’t always know what to do with chipmunks.
5. Squirrels always know what to do with cats.
6. You can look out the window at funnel clouds. This does not mean that you should look out the window at funnel clouds.